Conditions of Love
by AnimeLancerEiji
Summary: SanadaYukimura. Uh, just a little bit OOC for them, though .. They do indeed face conditions of love :) Please read :D And yes, that was a BAD summary XD.
1. Default Chapter

**Conditions of Love**

Disclaimer: MM, I own nothing of PoT. Not Sanada, not Yukimura, not any of them :( …and that sucks. LOL. Therefore, I write happy fic;

_Chapter 1_

The look on his face sold him out. He was hurt…no, not hurt—_scared_. Fear was etched in every line, in every one of those features I had come to know so well. And, it was all because of me. Me and the illness that refused to remove itself from my body, taking away what I loved most.

The doctors told me it would be all right at first. Symptoms were miniscule, not much harm could be done. Well, it turns out they were wrong. Horribly wrong. So wrong, in fact, that I would have to be hospitalized because of their negligence. But, who was I to blame them? I was only the poor, muscle-impaired patient, knowing not the severity of the ailment.

And that was my downfall. I assumed everything would turn out all right. A couple of pills a day and the pain would go away, right? No. Wrong. The pain continued to increase, movement during practice would sometimes stop without warning. Now, it was clear to me, and to everyone else. This was something serious.

Physical therapy did not work. It was not a matter of training me to get over what caused my pain. It was getting it out of me that really mattered. They suggested surgery. Not just surgery—expensive surgery.

Worst of all, the chances for success were small.

Having just told him that, it seems he had taken it harder than I—and I had taken it pretty hard. His fear was what made his reaction differ from my own anger, disappointment. But, why? He did not have to go through what I had to. He did not understand what this surgery—this stupid _disease_—could do to me. Or to my tennis career. Nobody truly understood. Nobody, that is, except for me.

But what he said to me…what I least expected…changed everything. Everything that this whole trial had made me come to believe.

"Hating is easy, Yukimura, but love takes courage."

How did he know…what I had failed to see? Hate, growing within me, all this time. At the doctors, at the prospect of what my future held, at perhaps, even myself..? He knew, while I knew not.

I was struck with silence. Yes, this ordeal had changed me. What had happened to the calm, friendly captain of the Rikkai Dai Tennis Team? Apparently, he had vanished, leaving an empty, angry, hating shell of his former self. What _I _am now. Sanada was able to see this, while I myself did not. Confused? Yes—but fascinated as well.

Something about him, from this point on, changed about him. The way I saw him, perhaps, changed completely. I no longer saw him merely as my co-captain, but as a friend. He was the first to care, to visibly show what I had been hiding and feeling.

He was what I needed.

With that, he left my room, saying nothing more about the line he had quoted, or about my surgery to come.

-----

Time continued. Regionals were approaching—surgery was approaching—as the days and weeks passed. And every day after his first visit, Sanada came back.

He would tell me happenings at the tennis club. Everyone wishing for me to get well soon, and for a successful surgery. I was amazed. They had not forgotten me. Stuck in this hospital, I had forgotten there were people besides Sanada who cared…

Over time, Sanada taught me how to love again. I forgave the doctors—forgave them for something I had unjustly blamed them for, and began to love the children living at the hospital, sharing the same fate as myself. I did not realize it, but Sanada was instilling back within me what I had forgotten.

He became more than a friend—he became my mentor, and my confidante. He helped me when I knew not what to do with my current situation. I eagerly anticipated his visits every day, knowing with certainty that he would show up.

And he always did. I found that I could count on him. Even with all of his normal activities and responsibilities of school and tennis, he would make time for me. I had importance in someone's life. Someone I had least expected.

The same someone..that I learned to love…

To Be Continued! . 

XDXD.. Well, I hope that wasn't too bad! I just love a good Sana/Yuki . Not that..mine is any good .. But, I hope it was okay! Um, there are some details that I could have rechecked, but didn't because I was Laaazyyy. Anyway—Yukimura's "disease" did have something to do with muscle pains or malfunctions or something, I believe, but I dunno what it is exactly :P. My bad, my bad..should've checked that out. And there were lots of other details, etc that might not be correct but I'm still Lazy. Grammar might've been pretty bad too TT, lots of "ands" at the beginning of sentences o.O. Okie, nvm. Bye!


	2. Chapter 2

**Conditions of Love**

Disclaimer: Not mine. :(

Er..I think something weird happened when I tried to upload this chapter…it kind of disappeared? XD well, let me try again and hopefully this will work, now? TT sorry.

_Chapter 2_

Why was I so scared for him? This boy that I felt I hardly even knew until now? What did it matter to me if my captain had muscle pains that could—would, if given the chance—take his life? Oh, it mattered, and it mattered a lot. More than I ever imagined. How could I feel this way? Especially over another _boy_?

-

I had not been able to overtake him. He was the first who I could not beat, the first to surpass me at the game I thought I was best at. Tennis…I had always thought I was on top. But, I was wrong. Yukimura Seiichi had more than I did. He had the skills and, more importantly, he had the heart and love of the game.

At this time, the heart he played with was what I lacked. I was blessed with the natural talent for tennis at a young age, and had been playing ever since. Tennis came easily to me—I felt skills were enough, that I needed not to try.

When my family moved to Kanai, they enrolled me at a school called Rikkai. They had heard much praise for the tennis team there, and thought it would be best for me to receive schooling and participate locally with tennis.

Being over-confident, I was undaunted by Rikkai's "big name". It meant nothing to me, and I was sure I could beat anyone at that school.

And I did. I made a name for myself there—everyone in the club knew who Sanada Genichirou was. The coaches recognized me, asked me to compete for the captain position of their Regular's Team. Knowing I would definitely take the title, I agreed.

It was simple, beating everybody. Quite funny, even. To think they could ever match up with me. Everybody, until he came up to me, asked me for a simple match.

He was a candidate for captain too, he told me. The last one I would have to play. No, he was the last one I would have to beat. Without a second glance, I underestimated this boy. He was small—the word fragile even came to my mind. Beating him would be too easy, it almost made me feel sorry for him. _Almost_.

I had never been more wrong about any person before. This boy, I had so carelessly overlooked, was the first. Never had I seen anyone who had so much natural talent—talent that rivaled even my own—that played with so much heart and effort. It was like he put his entire being into the match, focusing only on his goal of victory. He beat me—an astonishing 6-2. Hardly believing the score, I shook his hand.

So, his name was Yukimura Seiichi. The brand new captain of Rikkai Dai's Tennis Team. He held my title, leaving me merely as co-captain. Disappointed, yes. Amazed? Even more so.

This boy taught me so much. I avoided him,though, he was too good for me. Never again would I underestimate anyone. He had such a love for the game that I never knew could exist. Time and time again, he would try to talk to me and tell me I could be greater than I already was—greater than he, even—if I could learn to truly love tennis.

I never listened to him, though. Tennis was not a person; it could not be a lover. It was a sport. You _played_ tennis, not _loved_ it.

Then he got sick. The doctors said it was hardly anything serious, recovery was highly possible. They were wrong, though. Yukimura was hospitalized, diagnosed with a muscle disease that could one day invade his lungs, eventually kill him. Not so serious, those doctors said? It seemed pretty serious to me—and I was upset with their stupidity.

-

It had been awhile since Yukimura was restricted to the hospital. I was promoted to "substitute captain" in his absence. But, it didn't feel right. It bothered me to no end. The one who loved tennis the most was the very one who had it taken away from him. And it was I who now held his "title".

So I tried my best to truly fulfill his position. I would learn to love tennis if it killed me. I would play my heart out for Yukimura. I would _be_ Yukimura, if that would help him to get well again.

Something within me developed for Yukimura. Something that I could not explain, not even to myself. It was odd, but I did not like him missing from our practices. I needed him there to push me, even when I tried to avoid him. He was so kind to me, so full of this inner peace or love that I couldn't recognize…and I missed it everyday.

Eventually, I couldn't take it anymore. I went to visit him. The Yukimura in the hospital room was not what I was expecting. This Yukimura was nothing like the Yukimura I had known. This Yukimura was angry, just plain angry at the world, and full of doubt. I was able to recognize this change in him—I didn't know if he had, yet.

This Yukimura told me that he would need to undergo surgery, success rates were few. I was shocked; when was this surgery to be held? Of course it had to be the day of the regionals against Seigaku, when Rikkai needed him the most. And, I was scared for him.

I tried not to let my emotions show. I couldn't. I had to be strong for him—he was such a wreck, nothing like he used to be. Such a dramatic change in him would only perhaps worsen if I let myself change dramatically by showing emotion that I had never before showed.

I was left speechless…Or so I thought.

"Hating is easy, Yukimura, but love takes courage."

Where did those words come from? I hardly remembered speaking them. Hatred? Yes, I knew he felt hatred, though not towards me, exactly. But, _love_? Where had that come from? Did I…love Yukimura?

I didn't know what to do. I simply left the room.

-

But, that wasn't enough. I was left with an uneasiness in my gut that refused to go away. Is this what Yukimura felt like? Stuck with something inside of him that he didn't want? So I went back the next day. And the day after that. And all the days following. No matter how busy, Yukimura somehow maintained importance in my schedule.

I would tell him what happened at the tennis club, the other's wishes for a successful surgery and that they wanted him to get well soon. This seemed to slowly make him happy once more, brought more life back into him. I was glad. The old Yukimura was returning.

But, I was confused now. Why did I keep going back? What was so important about seeing him everyday? Then I realized, I really was scared for him, no matter how much I tried to hide it. Scared that, if I missed seeing him one day, he would be filled with hate again and forget what happiness was. I believed my visits gave him the sliver of hope that someone in the world still cared about him, wanted him to get well. Without me, he would simply lose that hope, lose his will for life. Death would overtake that Yukimura with ease.

Maybe I once again underestimated Yukimura. Perhaps he was still stronger than I believed him to be. That did not change the one fact, though. No matter how strong a person Yukimura was, I was still not as strong as he. The mere prospect of his death was enough to fill my entire body with fear.

This was different for me—new and strange. Yukimura is a boy, I am a boy. So, why—how—can I be drawn to him, worry so much for him? Time caused me to soon forget my qualms about the matter, and I was able to realize why I needed to go to that hospital room everyday.

I no longer cared that he was a boy, or that I was one, too.

I loved Yukimura Seiichi, and I would do anything to see him healthy again.

To Be Continued!

Eheh, well…after a loooong delay, I finally got to write Chapter 2! XD. I've been a bit lazy (again ..) and well, haven't really been checking up on things since Chapter 1 was first posted -. Yes, well, basically a Sanada POV, and some happy flashbacks . Uh..gosh, that was a looong delay T.T (still can't get over it) , and I haven't really been doing anything but…school, anime, etc. Ghei. Okay, hopefully I'll be more diligent next time, and that this chapter is worth something..good? Gah, I hope its not too repetitive /…LOL, Bye!

OH! Yay—Yukimura has Guillan-Barre! Muscle-y problems! Thanks for that information!


	3. Chapter 3

**Conditions of Love**

Disclaimer: Mm, still not mines. Yeah.

_Chapter 3_

It seemed strange that such a seemingly small disorder would need to have such a complex surgery to cure it. Or perhaps it was just Yukimura who was the complex one—he had never been one for simple things in life. Yukimura always took things one level higher, striving to go above and beyond the call of the norm. Why, though, did he even have to complicate the matter of Guillain-Barre? Simple enough was the disease to cure, but the surgery was going to be difficult for Yukimura's case. The doctors couldn't seem to understand it, but knew there were increased risks in this particular case that were normally non-existent. Why? It seemed so unfair.

Sanada was worried. And Sanada hardly ever worried. And why was it that whenever the subject of Yukimura came about, was when Sanada worried most? That was beside the point; his captain was to go into the strangest surgery the following day, and he was going to be playing tennis.

Tennis was something he had learned to dread if he was playing alone—specifically, alone without Yukimura. Yukimura's presence on the tennis courts was like a beacon for Sanada. He sought out Yukimura's light, the light that constantly challenged him to become better, to become the best he could be. Whenever he thought he had reached the captain's standards, the bar would again be lifted. Recently, there was no light for Sanada to search for, no bar to be raised, no goal for him to reach. No Yukimura there to challenge him.

But he knew what he was capable of, and it was definitely greater than anything Seigaku had to offer. His—no, Yukimura's—entire team was more than enough to take down Seigaku's best, he believed. The time would be nothing. They would all complete the match before Yukimura had even entered his surgery, presenting their captain with the hard-earned medal. After all, it was Yukimura who put together the flawless Rikkai Dai tennis team, and it was Yukimura who would be rewarded as such. Or so was Sanada's belief.

"The medal is as good as ours. It'll be in your hands before you undergo your surgery. That's a promise, Yukimura."

"I have faith in you, in our team."

"We will not lose; our victory will be dedicated to you entirely. You, more than anyone, deserve it. We've worked hard this year—harder still when we found out we wouldn't have our captain with us at the finals. We all want to win this for you."

Yukimura simply smiled. "Don't forget: its you who has been leading them in my absence, and I daresay you've done an excellent job, Captain."

"No, I could never replace you. Hurry and get well; we need you. We'll be outside the surgery doors before you enter them. You're strong, and you've proven that to me. Prove it to the world through this. I don't know why this disease is so complicated with you, but you're strong, I know it. You're Rikkai's true unbeatable captain."

"As are you. Good luck tomorrow, Sanada."

"And you. Be safe, be strong. We'll all be here for you."

"I'll be waiting."

-----

So ends their conversation preceding the next big chapter in their lives. Words were exchanged; however, the words that needed to be said were not. These words were kept locked within each boy's heart, kept quietly waiting for their chance to be released. The time remained unknown, unprepared for, but existed nonetheless. No matter how simple the words were, neither could bring himself to say them when they needed to come out. Three words—a sentence doesn't get much simpler than three words—_I love you_.

-----

It was time, the day that could possibly change both of their lives forever. Sanada met the rest of the Rikkai Dai Tennis Regulars at the courts. He didn't know how to express to them how important it was that they all be there for Yukimura, that they all win for their captain. Yukimura would be fighting a battle alongside them, though against a much different opponent. No matter. Rikkai and Yukimura would all embrace victory that day—there was nothing Sanada wanted more for the time being.

"We've come this far, and I want you all to keep in mind that it was all Yukimura's doing. He compiled us as a team, and we are meant to be unbeatable. Rikkai will not lose today, and it will be assured that Yukimura will not lose, either. We are strong, and we will be there for him."

The team didn't need to say anything, for they knew their co-captain spoke the truth. They realized how valuable Yukimura was, and that they owed it to him to present nothing less than their best. For his sake, at least, they would do all they could to bring home the gold.

Matches commenced, and had started off going as planned, if not a little slower than expected. Rikkai's doubles both triumphed over Seigaku's doubles pairs. Marui and Jackal had done well, and even the well-known Golden Pair had experienced defeat by the ingenious combination of Niou and Yagyuu.

Sanada was relieved to have created such a seemingly strong line-up without Yukimura's help. He had his doubts forming this line-up, but Yukimura refused to give him any opinions. Sanada was, after all, the captain while Yukimura was hospitalized.

However, after the doubles, Rikkai began to fall apart. It appeared that he had underestimated the power of Seigaku's singles players. Yanagi had lost the Singles Three position, but that match-up had been on uneven ground since the beginning. Sanada hadn't expected Kirihara to have lost; it completely threw off everything Sanada had planned for. Yukimura was due in for surgery within the hour, and unexpectedly, Sanada had to play. He couldn't blame Kirihara, though, nor anyone else on the team. It was his own mistakes that cost him precious time, and he was now making up for it.

There was no reason for Yukimura to be penalized for his mistakes. The team could still make it in time, though they would have no medal to present. That would have to suffice, so long as Yukimura had moral support waiting for him.

It didn't seem fair, though, that everyone besides him was giving their captain that support. They would be there, in body, for Yukimura, while no part of him was there. And he claimed he loved Yukimura—at least, to himself. It was a fine way to show it, by him not being there for the one he cared most about. His jacket. He didn't know what good it would do, but it would help in some way, he knew. Yukimura would understand. The jacket would bridge whatever gap there was between them until he got there with the medal in hand.

Nothing was going to stop him—he couldn't be there for Yukimura before the surgery, but he would be there the second Yukimura awoke. It was his promise, and this time, it was one he intended to keep.

For now, he prepared for the serve.

To be Continued!

Uhm, well, this chapter is kinda different from the first two because I wanted to get out of first person point of views. It focuses more on the development of the story, even though development of this chapter is extremely minimal and it is rather short XP. Forgive me, but I got lazy again. Hopefully it wasn't too bad of a chapter. Oh yes, it seems Guillain Barre is not always a super serious thing…but it seems they made it dangerous in the series…I tried to work around that here. Sorry if its inaccurate. Also, I think I changed the personalities a bit from when they were telling the story in their own POV's. It wasn't intentional, but its still there, and ahh! This chapter seems kinda rushed, too, in its shortness :(. Oh well, more next time!


	4. Chapter 4

**Conditions of Love**

Disclaimer: Don't own. Blahhh!

_Chapter 4_

Twenty minutes into the surgery, the unexpected and the unreasonable happened. Yukimura's body began to shut down, refusing the air artificially being pumped into his body. Slowly, he was slipping into paralysis, a coma, a completely different world. The doctors didn't know what had happened, or why it was happening. They simply knew that it was dangerous, and the possibility of Yukimura losing his life had upped a large percentage.

Frantically, a nurse was sent outside to the waiting members of the Rikkai team. She attempted to calmly inform them of Yukimura's current situation, but was having a difficult time. The conditions that Yukimura was under seemed to be one in a million, and the nurse was completely taken by his strange reactions. Apparently, the Rikkai team was no calmer. Their lack of understanding didn't help the situation, either.

Demands were made. "Will he survive!" "This can't be happening! Don't your people know what they're doing!" "Make him better, now! I don't care how—just don't let him die!" The appalled nurse could do no more. Tears at the ready, she felt their immense concerns and knew she was completely unable to do anything. She was beginning to lose hope. She couldn't let them see it, though. No. She had to be strong, she had to offer them the only hope she could think of.

"Is there anyone you can possibly call? Anyone else close to him?"

One boy with his eyes closed, she didn't know who, simply said, "Sanada. He needs to know." He walked to the phone booth and dialed a number.

-----

Sanada had lost. No matter how incomprehensible the idea seemed, he had lost to Echizen Ryoma. But he had taken his defeat like a true captain of Rikkai. Echizen had apparently earned his win, and Sanada wasn't about to deny the younger boy's talent.

So Rikkai had come in second place. He hated to admit defeat, especially because everything all had come down to his match and his match alone. It didn't hurt him as much as it hurt to think of the broken promise he had made to Yukimura. He promised Yukimura the gold, but was going to present him with the silver. He knew Yukimura wouldn't be angry—Yukimura was past all of that—and he knew Yukimura would be proud no matter what, because he had led the team this far.

But he had promised the gold. Silver simply wasn't enough to satisfy _him_. He didn't want to, but began to believe that he wasn't good enough, that he hadn't been determined enough, to win Yukimura the promised gold medal. Disappointment began to cloud his mind. It didn't seem fair—Rikkai was undergoing hard times, and yet, Seigaku was the team who had claimed victory. Oddly enough, Sanada did not fail to recognize the fact that Tezuka, Seigaku's captain, was also not with his team due to his shoulder injury. Both Rikkai and Seigaku were missing the most fundamental part of their teams: their captains. And apparently, Sanada hadn't been enough to cover for his captain, while Oishi had managed to prove his worth to Seigaku.

Sanada's thoughts were interrupted by his beeping phone. He had a new voice message. "Sanada. Yukimura has gone into a comatose state. He needs you; the team needs you. Get to the hospital as quickly as you can."

The message was the least expected, and the least wanted thing Sanada had wanted to hear. _Why now? Why Yukimura? _Things just couldn't seem to get worse. Not only did he not succeed in attaining the gold, he wasn't there for Yukimura when his life could possibly be in great danger.

He hurriedly packed his things and began looking for the nearest bus stop.

-----

The doctors had barely managed to stabilize Yukimura's breathing. He now began to accept the air that was filling his lungs, but he still hadn't woken up. It was yet to be known whether he was still asleep due to the anesthesia or because of a coma. They were afraid because it would most likely be the latter, though they were always allowed to hope. The surgery was dismissed for fear of further complications, and Yukimura was carefully taken to a clean room in the ICU.

Sanada had just arrived at the hospital as Yukimura was being pushed down the hallway on a stretcher. Helplessly, he watched as he tried to estimate his captain's condition. _I can't lose you now, Yukimura. Not when I haven't even told you, yet…_

"Sanada. They say he'll be fine in time. For now, what he needs is rest. We don't know why the surgery didn't follow up as planned, but he's in a coma. You can visit him in a bit, when they allow it."

Sanada slowly turned to the voice, barely comprehending the words. "He's not dead. He's not going to die, right? We're all going to wake up, and when we do, Yukimura will be completely healthy and cured…"

Yanagi sighed. "No. This is reality, not a dream—no matter how much you want it to be. He's in a coma. There's nothing anyone can do now. Time is the only thing that can heal him."

Nothing was making sense to Sanada, nothing registering in his mind. Above all, he didn't want Yukimura to die. They had hardly had any time together—they had so much more to learn about one another, so many more memories to create. "Time…" he whispered.

-----

It felt like ages, but the doctors finally allowed them to go in one by one. Sanada was the first. He had so many things to say, so many things that Yukimura needed to know.

Upon entering the room, he was overcome with so many emotions. Yukimura looked different, somehow—more fragile and tiny than ever before. This was a completely different captain than the one Sanada knew. He hadn't seen Yukimura look so different except before his acceptance of Guillain-Barre. It scared him.

Slowly, he began to whisper.

"Yukimura… There's so much I need to tell you. I know I should've told you all of this earlier, before this all became out of control, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not winning the championship. You probably won't be angry, but I promised you a win. Yukimura, I promised you the gold. I fell short; not only of your expectations but my own. If you were there, you would have been able to do it. I wish I could have your determination, your courage. Look at you, now—still braver than me. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not being here for you when I promised that as well. I've broken so many of my promises to you—how can you even stand me? I'll understand if you don't later, I deserve as much. I _will_ promise you one last thing, and if I can't fulfill this, I won't ever think of bothering you again. Yukimura, you should've known long before you underwent this; I should've told you. I love you, and I always will. I can't carry on without you any longer, so please, pull through this, if not for me, than for your sake. I know you're strong enough. This time, I'll be waiting for you, forever if need be. I love you—so much."

Seeing as there was nothing more he could say, Sanada slowly stood up. It was time for him to go. How he could bear to leave Yukimura was currently beyond his knowledge, but he managed to tear himself away. Kirihara entered soon after him.

He left the hospital then and began to wander the surrounding streets. As if to match Sanada's crying soul, the heavens opened up and a light rain began to fall. Looking up, Sanada began to lose himself in thought. Completely unaware of his surroundings, he wandered into the middle of the road. He failed to notice the car speeding towards him. There was a screech of brakes, the honk of a horn, and then a dull thud.

Sanada didn't know what happened. He only felt darkness beginning to overcome him. He didn't yet feel the pain, didn't feel the blood, didn't hear the voices calling out to him to see if he was all right. The rain continued to fall, and Sanada felt the drops mix with the tears he didn't know he'd been crying. He could only think of Yukimura. And yet, he had finally said it…

_I love you._

And then, there was nothing.

-to be continued!

Hi. I've hardly had any time to update this story until recently (yay for fall breaks!) , and it's so short too t.t. Updates are becoming farther in between. :sigh: Well, chapter four is up :) and hopefully it was decent. Managed to get some plot in this chapter :D. Sorry if the speech-thing was kinda lame :(…looking back, he said sorry quite a bit, lol. Ah well, Sanada is so angsty :D. Hm, the style seems to have changed a bit from the first two chapters, too. Hope that's okay (?). What else... Oh, the medical stuff is probably not accurate, if anything--I tried XD. Oo, and it's a cliffhanger, so I'll try to update soon (or at least, sooner than this time around)! More next time :P.


End file.
